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12 Things You Undervalue Until You’re a Parent
1) Showering by yourself, taking your time, and using super hot water. 2) Going to the bathroom without an audience. 3) Silence. 4) Sleeping in past 7am. 5) Talking on the phone. 6) Folding laundry in one sitting. 7) Car rides. Alone. 8) Listening to any kind of music you want. 9) Going out to dinner as a form of relaxation, not because you have no food in the house and you’re too tired to brave the grocery store. 10) Being spontaneous. A movie? At 9:30pm on a Tuesday? Just because you feel like it? Hahaha No. 11) Only cleaning up after yourself, and occasional your spouse. 12) Being sick…
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True Spirit
Sometimes it can be hard to remember the intention of something; take the Holiday Season. It’s easy to get stressed out and overloaded with all that goes into making this time special, especially when you have children. I got so mad the other day because wrapping the presents was getting done too slowly. We ran out of paper, couldn’t find the tape, and the kids were drawing on the presents with a sharpie. I ran to Costco for more supplies, with a bow stuck to my ass and my holiday cheer nowhere to found. I was trying to pack our bags for our trip and my one-year old was sitting…
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Talking To Your Children About Religion; A Tale
Talking with your children about religion can be a challenge in any household but it is especially hard to do so when two parents come from different belief systems. My husband is Christian, and I was raised with a mix of Native American and aging hippie views. Even back in the early days of our relationship, we agreed that when the time came and we had children, we would expose them to different religions. Furthermore, my theory was that showing them diversity from a young age would make them less judgmental of any relgion as they got older. We agreed that whenever an oppertunity organically arose, we would broach the…
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Public Service Announcement
Mommies, daddies, nannies– You know what really grinds my gears? You bringing your coughing, snotty child to the playground/play date or any close quarters in which my child will inevitably end up eating your child’s boogers. I get it– your kid has been cooped up and needs to burn off some energy. You’re tired too, and a little break is warmly welcomed. Although the liquid pouring from your lovely angel’s nose may make the slide go faster for my kids following behind, I am cursing you. After our two cuties have been chasing each other and holding hands, and I see you check yours’ forehead for a high temp, I…
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Toddler OCD
My toddler has developed OCD at bedtime. The usual attitude of “laugh it off” no longer applies, once the clock strikes bedtime. It all started with her sound machine. The sound machine was a genius buy (or so I thought). It has lots of cool buttons, lights reflect animals on the ceiling and a loud white noise makes the thin walls of our house less apparent. Unfortunately, my child is hilariously unique and quirky, and decided that white noise was not for her. She figured out that the machine has different settings, and settled on a particular Mozart piece to lull her into dream land. Now, in theory, this makes…
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The Most Thoughtful Thing My Mother-In-Law Has Ever Said
Let me begin by saying that I am one of the lucky few that has a killer mother-in-law. She’s sweet, caring and accepted me into her family from day one. But she said something to me years ago that has really stuck, and it is something every mother should consider: “I recognized that when my children started families of their own, I was no longer their first priority. Their family was.” This statement hit home before I had kids. But after, it rings as one of the most thoughtful and hardest things a mother can realize. I look at my own children and ponder the day that I, too, will…
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A Little Perspective
I find it easy to get bogged down in every day worries. Especially as a mother. The news is full of violent flu epidemics, sweeping the nation. During winter every cough or fever can be an anxiety ridden train that it’s hard to jump off of. But a little perspective can do a world of good. My kids both have colds. They started with fevers which always make me nervous. My husband I put them to bed last night, and I sat on the couch as waves of worry rolled over me. I’m not naturally a nervous person, so this feeling makes me…more anxious. And then I saw on clip…
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Daddy Will Fix It
I admit it, I’ve gotten lazy. But in the ebb and flow of marital responsibility, my husband and I have subconsciously divided duties. I can fix things– really. I’m actually quite handy. But on a day-to-day basis with two small children, sometimes it’s easier to put chores off on my husband. Oh, the leg broke off of your dollhouse chair? Daddy will fix it. Your super fun toy that makes really loud noises has run out of batteries? Daddy will fix it. This was working out splendidly for me…until it wasn’t. My daughter (who observes everything I do like a vulture) was playing with a baby whose legs were made…
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Vag Connections
I have this dear friend. Let’s call her Mephanie, to protect her identity. We were recently texting about losing baby weight…well really just weight at all. Especially when you start to get older. It’s a battlefield. During our conversation, I had an epiphany AND created a new slogan for women everywhere. It goes as follows: (It should be noted that my phone autocorrected “get” to “vag”, meaning I must use that word a lot more then I was aware of). Now, I had meant to type “I totally get that”. But after seeing it emboldened on my phone screen, I realized I had stumbled upon a fantastic expression. VAG [vaj]…
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My Daughter Dresses Like a Hobo
I’ve never understood why people get so caught up in what their children are wearing. Some mothers are obsessed with name brand clothing or making sure that their kids never leave the house without looking their best. A part of me wants this– I love a pair of rolled-up jeans paired with suspenders on a three-year-old. Or a dress that is pure white and adorned with lace for my darling daughter. Don’t get me wrong–I adore a cute kid in a cute outfit. But at some point, especially with girls, they develop their own personalities which can come with a fashion “sense”. My daughter’s fashion sense, if you were being generous,…