Ten Indicators That You’ve Turned into Your Mother

1.  You pick up gardening as an enjoyable hobby. You frequent flower sales, your garage is filled with empty planters, and you like to talk about the benefits of compost.

2.  You repeat outdated phrases because there is no modern equivalent. You say things like, “Well that’s just the bee’s knees!”

3.  You catch yourself telling the same story over and over again, to the annoyance of those around you. Even when someone says, “Oh– you’ve told me this before,” you continue on as if they never said a thing.

4.  You judge teenagers by their clothes. Especially young people. But aren’t they asking for it with those crop tops and weird jeans? Whatever happened to people being modest?

5.  You become the adult that says, “Oh my goodness, Danny! I knew you when you were a baby! How’d you get so big?”

6.  The balance between “comfort” and “fashion” is now heavily weighted on the “comfort” side. You may own Birkenstocks, ballet flats, and lots of cardigans.

7.  Your bras and panties no longer call say Come hither. Instead, they moan Dear God, woman! Take me out of my misery!

8.  You have uttered the phrase, “Kids these days…”

9.  You used to fight the things ingrained in your genetic makeup. Now, the unruly curly hair is something you instill in your children to be proud of.

10.  You stop mid-sentence, horrified, realizing that you have just repeated word-for-word something your mother has always told you.