Diary of an Angry Pregnant Woman,  Thoughts

Week…12??

I had our check-up today with my doctor. As usual, I had to strip down and put on my paper gown and “vest”. We had a grown-up ultrasound today; the kind you see in the movies where they rub gel on your stomach.

Everything is progressing nicely! In fact, somehow we gained a week! I thought we were at 11 weeks, but apparently we lost a week…because according to the doctor this is week 12. I don’t know…maybe a time warp…or the result of the cloning they did at my last appointment.

During the ultrasound, the doctor spotted something strange. It was a large black sack, opposite the baby and equal in size. She was concerned that perhaps it was a cyst, so she whipped out ol’ faithful, aka the dildo ultrasound. It wasn’t a cyst, only my bladder. Honestly, if they tell you drink a liter of water before your appointment, what more would they expect? Shit, lady. My eyes were practically floating in urine.