Having a three-year-old is a challenge but is also one of the funniest ages. Your child starts having thoughts of their own, and they are able to express these to you…often quite loudly. My husband and I started keeping a list of all of the funny things our daughter has said and done in the past year. If you haven’t already, write this stuff down! I always think I’ll remember. But I have no brain anymore.

There is always a running commentary when she goes to the bathroom. Today’s was, “Look daddy! My poop looks like chili!”

And another: “Oh man, my toots smell like chewy bars.”

I asked P what she wanted to be for Halloween. She told me that she wanted to be a turkey, but not the kind in the sandwich.

P had a booger on her finger and didn’t know what to do with it. I watched in horrified silence as she tried to put it back in her nose.

My husband was very excited because he had bought a remote-controlled car. P sat excitedly beside him and shouted, “Let’s open this bad boy up!”

P, while driving in the car starts crying.

“What’s the matter?” I ask.

“I want to put my toot back in my bottom!”

My husband asked our daughter, “What do you want to name the truck?”

She took a moment and then nodded.

“Chubby.”

“I want my baby that her head turns like this!” (Places her hands on her heads and shows how it can rotate.)

P, while turning in circles remarks, “Wait, where did my toot go?”

My daughter asked my husband, “What are you doing?”

“Cleaning the garage ’cause it’s so messy.” He replied.

She shrugged. “Oh, could be worse!”

P was showing Grandma around the house and points to the guest room and says, “This is where my daddy sleeps!” (I swear– my husband does not sleep in the guest room.)

Something stunk.

“P did you toot?” I asked.

“Yeah! Three times!”

I was trying to go to the bathroom in peace. My three-year-old decided to pull up a stool and encourage me. Some of her best lines were:

“Oh I heard it! You’re definitely pooping!”

“Keep going and make sure you get it all out!”

P’s nose started running, and she said, “My nose isn’t working right! See, listen!”

We passed a sign for “In ‘n Out” on the freeway. P pointed and said, “Look! That’s the sign for burgers!”

We were in the car and P just told me, “Mom I just ate my toenail. But I didn’t like it.”

While making cookies out of playdoh: “Should I put more peanut butter on that? Maybe not because that would be cray-cray.”

While playing in her kitchen, P turned to her brother and asked, “Brother, would you like me to put some protein on that? I think it would be better if there’s more protein on that. Mama would you like some protein?”

My husband had P listen to Nirvana for the first time. He asked her what she thought of it.

“It’s kind of scary. But I like it.”