To all the parents during COVID-19; you got this.

Guys. Take a deep breath. I know that we are feeling overwhelmed. This is a strange time to be alive.

History is being made every day. Books will be dedicated to how the situation was handled, how people reacted, and there will be tables upon tables on quantifiable data.

But guess what? Our kids most likely won’t give a damn about the tables. Or the graphs. Or how exponential math is relevant in the time of COVID-19. But what they will remember is this time spent with you.

They will remember sitting in heat of the sun, planting a shoot of garlic in the moist soil. They will recall how they tended the bulb for weeks beforehand, and how soft the dirt was when they pressed it in. They will remember the weight of the watering can, and the splash of the cold water on their toes.

They will remember saving the life of that one bee, Fiona.

They will remember storytimes, sprawled out on the living room floor.

They will remember the dance parties, the slime making, and perhaps the way that that vein in your forehead bulged out when you were trying to explain to them that when you were a kid, “carrying the one” was how we old folks added two numbers together.

It is ok to feel overwhelmed right now. We are all feeling it at times. But these hard days, these hard times, should not be regarded as failures.

Maybe one of the lessons that we can teach our kids right now is reasonable expectations; both for ourselves and for others.

If you’re having a no school work in this household sort of day, then embrace it. Announce it. Shout it from the rooftops! Nobody knows what day it is, anyway. You can have a Saturday on a Monday. NO ONE CARES.

If your kids want to devote an entire day to building a transmogrifier because you’ve been reading Calvin and Hobbes, DO IT. They are learning how many bodies can fit in a box (spatial awareness), how to make a door (engineering), and that people don’t like boogers wiped on their walls (manners).

If you start to feel low, if you need some joy in your life, then get back to the basics. Take a break from the news. Go outside if you can, even if it is just to play a game of tag in your backyard.

Read. Watch a show at 12 pm on a Tuesday.

Bake brownies and eat them straight from the pan.

Dress up like you’re reenacting prom in the early 2000s, and show up for your lunch of PB&J’s dressed to impress.

We all know that we are going to look back on our time with our children and think, it’s never enough. Well, this is our opportunity to make the most of it. This is our excuse to get the most of it.

Take a moment to thank all of the essential workers out– from the garbage men to the mail carriers. Our nurses, doctors, teachers, and grocery store employees. Use it as a chance to teach your children about gratitude.

Parents around the world are feeling the burn of having to field every question, learn what the fuck a number sentence is, create activities, cook meals, and tackle that never-ending pile of dishes.

I know it isn’t going to be all sunshine and rainbows. Many of us are trying to balance working from home and schooling our children. Even while trying to juggle this somewhat impossible task, it is important to recognize that we are lucky to have a job and to have food on our tables. We can feel overwhelmed while also feeling grateful.

The latest numbers indicate that there are over 10 million people who have lost their jobs and are currently filing for unemployment. Take a second. Breathe that in.

For those who aren’t as concerned with schoolwork as you are with feeding your children, for those of you who are wondering what the world is going to look like for you next week, and next month— please seek out the community around you. Many of us are willing and able to help. Ask.

This isn’t easy for anyone. We are going to struggle. But there is joy and inspiration to be found in the little things; in long cuddles on the couch and scavenger hunts through the neighborhood. If we readjust our expectations for ourselves and others, we can toss the very notion of failure out the window.

Instead, we can embrace that our children have been wearing the same clothes since Saturwedtuesday. We can allow that some days may be spent having a Disney movie marathon instead of doing school work. We can belly-laugh when our four-year-old draws a mustache in Sharpie on his face because really, who cares? He ain’t going anywhere.

And if you need a minute, I suggest hiding in your closet with a bottle of wine. It’s called self-care, friends.

Hang in there. Stay safe. And reach out if you need anything.